Learning again

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 I've always been a bit of a geek when it comes to learning. I was the child at primary school who pointed out teachers' incorrect spellings, or who had the stock phrase "I've finished all the work, what else can I do?" - this dimmed at secondary school a little. It was less cool to be academic, even at my high-pressured all-girls-grammar. There was fierce competition to be top of the class there, but in English, French, Home Ec and Drama I revelled in A grades. At sixth form, I bunked off a LOT because I'd discovered the pub. However, I still made it my mission to get As for my English A Levels, and I also thrived studying Media Studies, and somehow bagged a 100% mark for my Media Studies A Level exams. All while existing on daytime rounds of pints on sticky tables scattered with lighters and packets of Marlboro Lights. I went to university and found it extremely challenging, but I came out with a 2:1 and a mortal fear of shared living. 

It's been a while since all that, though. I'm now 36, and the last time I was in education was well over a decade ago. 

When I signed up to study with the RHS, I was incredibly nervous. I kept reading and re-reading the course details, but my mouse hovering over the 'Enrol now' button for weeks. I bit the bullet. I enrolled. But then the self doubt hit. How will I manage my time? What if I get called back to work full time and I can't fit it in? (I'm still on furlough, eight months after going on it initially) Am I good enough to do this course? Good old insecurity! 

After a rocky start of feeling totally overwhelmed (the reading material is immense, I've never opened so many PDFs in my life, and I work in marketing) - I've cracked on, and I'm getting in the zone. I've got two B grades under my belt and I'm enjoying the structure of the course. I'm learning a huge amount. 

Gardening is not new to me, but the formal learning of it is. I just want to know more about the rules and standards of gardening, I want to understand the terminology as I continue on this gardening journey of my own. And I could not be enjoying it more. And I feel like the timing is good: it's winter, so there's little to distract me out in the garden itself. I can devote the dark afternoon hours to studying, imagining all the things I'll be planting come spring, when I'll have a renewed sense of enthusiasm for it all. 

And I've forgotten how much I enjoy putting things in ring binders! A bit of a geek, I told you... 💚


 

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